I had a great conversation with a friend, Mary at Church today, however I was suprised by my own reaction and feelings! Mary told me two amazing stories about people who have inadvertantly found a member of their birthfamily.
In one of the stories, two strangers were sitting next to each other in a random church – which were in niether of their hometown cities, and at the end of the service they turned to each other and simply said “wow, that was a great sermon,” this comment led to a longer conversation where they eventually figured out that they were related! They were mother and daughter!! The daughter was adopted at a young age, and was now an adult.
The second story, was about a grown woman who went to get her car serviced at a Jiffy Lube (or something similar). She went inside and sat down in the waiting room, and ended up striking up a conversation with someone sitting next to her. Somehow throughout the conversation the first woman said something about having a son when she was 16 years old that she gave up for adoption, the other woman asked what her son’s birthdate was, because her aunt had adopted a baby boy. To make a long story short, the woman’s aunt had adopted this stranger’s baby. So, they were reunited!
These stories seem so conincidental, and exciting, I should’ve reacted as such, however I started crying!! I didn’t know why I was crying until I talked about it with Bryan, and I realized that if this ever happened to me, I would not know how to react. If something so unexpected happened without any preparation I am not sure if I could be happy or sad, or too overcome with emotion to speak! I’d like to think that this whole process will happen just as I am planning it in my head, which looks like this:
1. 1 year of research and attempting to locate my birthfamily (addresses/phone number/email etc).
2. Making contact with someone in my birthfamily, and setting up a time to meet at a restaraunt in Tennessee.
3. Meeting at the restaraunt, and having a civil conversation, and finding out all about my history, and hearing stories about my birth-relatives.
4. Flying back home, but keeping a relationship via snail-mail, maybe writing to each other once or twice a year.
I know that things rarely end up how we’ve planned, so I’m attempting to be open to deviations to my plan, however I’m hoping that things don’t differ from how I’ve imagined too much, otherwise I’m not sure that I’ll be able to handle it.
I’m begining to wonder if I am emotionally strong enough to go on this journey towards finding my birthfamily!